When I started traveling back in October I had a loose plan in my head: after Bolivia and a quick return home for Thanksgiving, I'd fly to Colombia and start working my south spending about one month per country. A family trip to Cuba for Christmas moved that plan back by a few months, but when I arrived in Cartagena on January 24th I still believed I would be somewhere around Chile by now. My flight out of Medellin left May 21st, almost 4 months after arrival. How did that happen? I can point to 2 concrete reasons, with a third holistic cause.
First, I met Pete and the van - we roadtripped through the entirety of Colombia but skipped the Northern Coast, so there were a few parts of Colombia I still needed to see. But there is no way I go back to Colombia without number 2: I had planned to meet friends from home in Barranquilla for Carnival. I was all the way in Southern Ecuador before I flew back to Colombia and would have been fine to keep going with that travel family. So I spent Carnival with friends, figured I'd relax on the beach for a few days, head to Medellin for another few, maybe see the coffee country again, and be done with Colombia round 2 in about three weeks. The land of the lotus eaters and Paola's eco-farm had a different plan, and 3 weeks turned into 3 months.
Ultimately I think it comes down to this: Colombia is just a comfortable country. It's incredibly safe, you've got beaches, mountains, jungles, and everything in between, the infrastructure and amenities are comparable to home, and every place has its own version of awesome nightlife. Hell, after the World Cup I could potentially go back and spend another month in Cali salsa dancing, although my instinct right now tells me it is time to finally move on.
Without further preamble here is how Colombia fits into my country ratings. 4 months in a country certainly gives me way more insight into its inner workings than 3 weeks in one city like Veracruz, but I still like to compare. As a reference, I am comparing Colombia to Bolivia, Mexico, and Cuba.
Food: A typical Colombian meal consists of a soup, followed by some sort of meat, rice, beans, plantains, and shrubbery. Quality ranges from place to place but you pretty much know what to expect - its going to be decent but nothing amazing. Of course, I was here long enough to discover some gems... here are my top 3 places I dined at:
Brunch - Salento (American Cuisine): I covered this one in an earlier post but to summarize: awesome burgers, greasy breakfasts, delicious peanut butter chocolate brownies.
Baba Ganoush - Taganga (Mediterranean Cuisine) I only ate here once but had one of the best fillet mignons I've ever eaten. Coupled with a falafel appetizer and a chocolate brownie sundae for under $20 and this was the perfect place for a nice treat.
Crepes and Waffles - Medellin and Bogota (Crepes and Waffles Cuisine): I ate here the last 5 days I spent in Medellin. Crepes and Waffles only hires single mothers (the kind of discrimination I have no problem advocating for but would be shot down immediately in litigious USA) and only serves delicious food. My go to order would be the Mexican crepe with a Nutella waffle topped with vanilla ice cream.
Colombian food doesn't come close to Mexico but ranks way above Bolivia. The staple dishes probably tie with Cuba, but Colombia gets the edge because of variety and the above-mentioned winners. Ranking: 2nd
Snack: I'm not sure if Colombia has a definitive snack like Bolivia's salteña or Cuba's churros. I guess it would be empanadas, something that each country in Latin America produces its own version of, and Colombia's have been the worst I've had. The key to a good empanada is the crust and Colombia just didn't deliver on that front. If the arequipe filled-donut I discovered in Amaga was more widespread that might have rescued Colombia from its last place finish, but alas that is not to be. Ranking: Last
Climate: Colombia has just about every climate imaginable so its tough to compare. The coast is scorching, the mountains get a bit chilly, and Medellin is almost perfect. For the sake of fairness I'll compare the climates of the cities I spent the most time in - Medellin/Amaga get the nod for Colombia. I can't say enough about how perfect the weather is in Sucre and even the city of eternal spring couldn't dethrone the Bolivian Goliath. Medellin came close though - high 70's during the day and low 60's at night is pretty solid. Clouds and the slightest of humidities foiled Medellin's run at number 1; there weren't that many truly sunny days in Medellin and it usually rained a bit each afternoon. Ranking: 2nd.
Music: I never thought I would hear music that I despised more than 80s rock. Journey, Bon Jovi... really every song that was played over and over again in New England bars transported me to auditory hell. Then I heard Vallenato. I'd heard similar music before - it's the accordion heavy type of music that sounds similar to what you would hear on a Spanish radio station in the US - but what really killed me was the widespread pandemic. It was inescapable. I just don't understand, Salsa, Merengue, and Bachata sound so much better and have equally entertaining dances to go with them: why deviate from a good thing?? Obviously music taste is a personal decision and I've heard the same criticisms about the electronic music I like. I don't care, Vallenato simply isn't good. The real shame is that Colombia had the best anthem of the trip so far - it took quite the music genre to relegate a song to the basement whose chorus translates to: "tonight I will give you penis, penis, penis." Unfortunately for "Serrucho," Vallenato buried this category at the bottom of that monster pile of fertilizer I raked the other week. Ranking: Dead Fucking Last.
Drinks: The Colombian national spirit is called aguardiente or "guaro" for short. It's terrible. It's clear, tastes like licorice, and at 25% alcohol by volume you have to drink almost twice as much to get the same effect as rum. The major beers Aguila, Club Colombia, and Pilsen are your typical Latin American lagers that don't have any particular flavor. I did enjoy the two alternative beer brands - Bogota Beer Company and 3 Cordilleras, especially the 3 Cordilleras Mestizo brand that was Colombia's closest thing to an IPA. Cuba and its armada of rums takes poll position here and after that it's kind of a toss up. Mexico didn't really have a local spirit but I'd rather have no local one than either aguardiente or Bolivia's Singani. Ranking: 3rd, the Mestizo gives Colombia the edge over Bolivia.
Clubs/Nightlife:
"I'll take countries with amazing nightlife and rediculously attractive women for $200, Alex."
"This South American country..."
"What is Colombia?"
"Right again, Señor Reader."
Colombia certainly confirmed its reputation for wild nightlife and good looking women. I probably quadrupled the amount of lifetime sunrises I've ever seen over the past 4 months, and not all of those were for sunrise meditation on the farm. From the beach parties on the coast, to the major cities of Medellin and Bogota in the central highlands, to Cali's salsa clubs in the south, there was always something to do at night. For sheer volume and talent I can't deny the power of Colombia here. Ranking: First
Language/Slang: Colombia has a number of different accents and sounds. The coast has a Caribbean flavor, and speaks quickly and cuts off some of the last consonants. Medellin is famous for its sing-song "Paisa" cadence. Bogota speaks slowly and clearly. After Cuba anything was going to sound better and even the coast was much easier to understand. I still put Mexico ahead because of its slang but Colombia ties with Bolivia for clarity. Ranking: T-Second
Adventure: The amount of time I spent in Colombia compared to the rest of the countries skews this category more than any other. I did paragliding, jungle camping, cave exploring, a number of hikes, and the biggest adventure of all - Carnival. But aside from Carnival those are all activities that I can do in other places. Still, you can't argue with actual experiences and Colombia delivered. Ranking: First.
Something Random: This might be a cop out, but I think a spontaneous 3-week road trip through the entirety of Colombia qualifies as something random. The van feels like a lifetime ago but still resonates as one of the highlights of any trip I've experienced. Throughout the number adventures I've been lucky enough to be apart of I've learned to be open minded and spontaneous, but that kind of road trip with a stranger was not something I remotely considered when I drew up the South American playbook. With all due respect to zebras of Sucre, the van reigns king. Ranking: First, by a mile (1.6km for you Pete).
First, I met Pete and the van - we roadtripped through the entirety of Colombia but skipped the Northern Coast, so there were a few parts of Colombia I still needed to see. But there is no way I go back to Colombia without number 2: I had planned to meet friends from home in Barranquilla for Carnival. I was all the way in Southern Ecuador before I flew back to Colombia and would have been fine to keep going with that travel family. So I spent Carnival with friends, figured I'd relax on the beach for a few days, head to Medellin for another few, maybe see the coffee country again, and be done with Colombia round 2 in about three weeks. The land of the lotus eaters and Paola's eco-farm had a different plan, and 3 weeks turned into 3 months.
Ultimately I think it comes down to this: Colombia is just a comfortable country. It's incredibly safe, you've got beaches, mountains, jungles, and everything in between, the infrastructure and amenities are comparable to home, and every place has its own version of awesome nightlife. Hell, after the World Cup I could potentially go back and spend another month in Cali salsa dancing, although my instinct right now tells me it is time to finally move on.
Without further preamble here is how Colombia fits into my country ratings. 4 months in a country certainly gives me way more insight into its inner workings than 3 weeks in one city like Veracruz, but I still like to compare. As a reference, I am comparing Colombia to Bolivia, Mexico, and Cuba.
Food: A typical Colombian meal consists of a soup, followed by some sort of meat, rice, beans, plantains, and shrubbery. Quality ranges from place to place but you pretty much know what to expect - its going to be decent but nothing amazing. Of course, I was here long enough to discover some gems... here are my top 3 places I dined at:
Brunch - Salento (American Cuisine): I covered this one in an earlier post but to summarize: awesome burgers, greasy breakfasts, delicious peanut butter chocolate brownies.
Baba Ganoush - Taganga (Mediterranean Cuisine) I only ate here once but had one of the best fillet mignons I've ever eaten. Coupled with a falafel appetizer and a chocolate brownie sundae for under $20 and this was the perfect place for a nice treat.
Crepes and Waffles - Medellin and Bogota (Crepes and Waffles Cuisine): I ate here the last 5 days I spent in Medellin. Crepes and Waffles only hires single mothers (the kind of discrimination I have no problem advocating for but would be shot down immediately in litigious USA) and only serves delicious food. My go to order would be the Mexican crepe with a Nutella waffle topped with vanilla ice cream.
Colombian food doesn't come close to Mexico but ranks way above Bolivia. The staple dishes probably tie with Cuba, but Colombia gets the edge because of variety and the above-mentioned winners. Ranking: 2nd
Snack: I'm not sure if Colombia has a definitive snack like Bolivia's salteña or Cuba's churros. I guess it would be empanadas, something that each country in Latin America produces its own version of, and Colombia's have been the worst I've had. The key to a good empanada is the crust and Colombia just didn't deliver on that front. If the arequipe filled-donut I discovered in Amaga was more widespread that might have rescued Colombia from its last place finish, but alas that is not to be. Ranking: Last
Climate: Colombia has just about every climate imaginable so its tough to compare. The coast is scorching, the mountains get a bit chilly, and Medellin is almost perfect. For the sake of fairness I'll compare the climates of the cities I spent the most time in - Medellin/Amaga get the nod for Colombia. I can't say enough about how perfect the weather is in Sucre and even the city of eternal spring couldn't dethrone the Bolivian Goliath. Medellin came close though - high 70's during the day and low 60's at night is pretty solid. Clouds and the slightest of humidities foiled Medellin's run at number 1; there weren't that many truly sunny days in Medellin and it usually rained a bit each afternoon. Ranking: 2nd.
Music: I never thought I would hear music that I despised more than 80s rock. Journey, Bon Jovi... really every song that was played over and over again in New England bars transported me to auditory hell. Then I heard Vallenato. I'd heard similar music before - it's the accordion heavy type of music that sounds similar to what you would hear on a Spanish radio station in the US - but what really killed me was the widespread pandemic. It was inescapable. I just don't understand, Salsa, Merengue, and Bachata sound so much better and have equally entertaining dances to go with them: why deviate from a good thing?? Obviously music taste is a personal decision and I've heard the same criticisms about the electronic music I like. I don't care, Vallenato simply isn't good. The real shame is that Colombia had the best anthem of the trip so far - it took quite the music genre to relegate a song to the basement whose chorus translates to: "tonight I will give you penis, penis, penis." Unfortunately for "Serrucho," Vallenato buried this category at the bottom of that monster pile of fertilizer I raked the other week. Ranking: Dead Fucking Last.
Drinks: The Colombian national spirit is called aguardiente or "guaro" for short. It's terrible. It's clear, tastes like licorice, and at 25% alcohol by volume you have to drink almost twice as much to get the same effect as rum. The major beers Aguila, Club Colombia, and Pilsen are your typical Latin American lagers that don't have any particular flavor. I did enjoy the two alternative beer brands - Bogota Beer Company and 3 Cordilleras, especially the 3 Cordilleras Mestizo brand that was Colombia's closest thing to an IPA. Cuba and its armada of rums takes poll position here and after that it's kind of a toss up. Mexico didn't really have a local spirit but I'd rather have no local one than either aguardiente or Bolivia's Singani. Ranking: 3rd, the Mestizo gives Colombia the edge over Bolivia.
Clubs/Nightlife:
"I'll take countries with amazing nightlife and rediculously attractive women for $200, Alex."
"This South American country..."
"What is Colombia?"
"Right again, Señor Reader."
Colombia certainly confirmed its reputation for wild nightlife and good looking women. I probably quadrupled the amount of lifetime sunrises I've ever seen over the past 4 months, and not all of those were for sunrise meditation on the farm. From the beach parties on the coast, to the major cities of Medellin and Bogota in the central highlands, to Cali's salsa clubs in the south, there was always something to do at night. For sheer volume and talent I can't deny the power of Colombia here. Ranking: First
Language/Slang: Colombia has a number of different accents and sounds. The coast has a Caribbean flavor, and speaks quickly and cuts off some of the last consonants. Medellin is famous for its sing-song "Paisa" cadence. Bogota speaks slowly and clearly. After Cuba anything was going to sound better and even the coast was much easier to understand. I still put Mexico ahead because of its slang but Colombia ties with Bolivia for clarity. Ranking: T-Second
Adventure: The amount of time I spent in Colombia compared to the rest of the countries skews this category more than any other. I did paragliding, jungle camping, cave exploring, a number of hikes, and the biggest adventure of all - Carnival. But aside from Carnival those are all activities that I can do in other places. Still, you can't argue with actual experiences and Colombia delivered. Ranking: First.
Something Random: This might be a cop out, but I think a spontaneous 3-week road trip through the entirety of Colombia qualifies as something random. The van feels like a lifetime ago but still resonates as one of the highlights of any trip I've experienced. Throughout the number adventures I've been lucky enough to be apart of I've learned to be open minded and spontaneous, but that kind of road trip with a stranger was not something I remotely considered when I drew up the South American playbook. With all due respect to zebras of Sucre, the van reigns king. Ranking: First, by a mile (1.6km for you Pete).
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